Spring has Sprung

It is the first beautiful day of the year in Chicago.

I just stepped outside to take a look at the lake. Whoa.

There is this immense beauty here - it's so contradictory. Where I'm at I get to see nature (the lake), old architecture and tributes to the new (or Miesian new). I love the conflict and how they all seem to change color due to the sky. The lake reflects against the buildings - the blue brings out the white in the stone of the law school across the street, makes the spire atop 680 even more blue and reflects brightness from the shiny metal of my workplace. You can't help but gape.

It smells like spring too. It's new and it's fleeting - it makes you walk faster - look higher and just wish for something amazing to happen. I like how it feels like possibility.

But for now, now I ponder and wish for some solace. Some sort of comfort that can help me feel like everything is going to be alright. I miss comfort. I haven't had it for so long.

Maybe this weekend I can find it. I'm volunteering at First Slice - I get to give food, sustenance to those who need it. I'm hoping through giving I can maybe feel some of that. Then to see my White Sox for the first time this season.

On my Chicago vacation I went to the Osaka Garden. The last time I had been there I had brought the 'boy who can not be named'. I admit I was nervous to be there again. Before I brought him there (b/c he said he wanted to go to Japan - and it was the best I could do as I couldn't really go out in public with him) it was my favorite secret place. It was a revelation - to be so outside the city but smack dab in the middle of the place. An oasis of calm on the south side.

Back to the story - so I went and I saw and I could breathe. He did not take that place away from me. I won't lie - when I took him there in the cold and he turned me around and kissed me...it was perfect. But really - it is still beautiful and tranquil and mine without him. That's ok.

And this weekend - this weekend is my return to Comiskey. My other favorite place. I love the camaraderie and the joy that the ballpark is. It's just so much fun - I don't know what to say. I can't wait to see my funnel cake guy.

Mmmmm. Powdered sugar. Fried dough. Ooooh.